I figured we're a few weeks into 2007 and I haven't really said anything public for a bit. I guess I'll start with a belayed "Happy New Year", this year is taking a different route then most years. I think because I feel comfortable to admit that it's going to be a different year, things that were once very important to me are not important at all.

Friends are dropping like flies it seems - mostly encouraged by me - some people I considered to be my closest friends are bad talking me behind my back - I know. What I think is bothering me more is I know that people aren't thinking with their heads and following like sheep. I can't have weak friends - they are either with me or their not. I don't think I need to name people - just reflect on it.

I spend less time with my family but it seems that the time I spend together has improved greatly -- almost like they all got together to discuss me and they've decided to rather than discuss topics directly they'll just be nice to reel me back in. I must admit, maybe I just want to believe this is true - it might be all in my head. Maybe making up for my lacking friends? My dad's last oncology reports were good actually, he went from 600 some odd markers to 6 @ the end of chemo back to 30. Which basically means those 2 year estimates will likely be extended. His liver is still considered critical tho because of the placement of tumors. I guess they wont say something different because that is such an unknown.

Work is much the same since the last few entries - pfft would be the one word to sum it all up I guess. Someone save me, please; right about now if you have even a 1/2 baked idea I'd pretty much be ready to jump on it.

Working out has been going well - could be going more consistantly tho - at christmas I fluctiated pretty dramatically; up 6 ibs within 2 weeks - but it was the easy type of weight to lose. My new goal is 245 by Feb 8th 2007; it's a challenge indeed - I'm not sure if I'm going to make it, but I'm going to try pretty hard (600calories * 20 days [works out to ~38 minutes of hard cardio] + weight lifting) but I'm not going to check my weight until nearly Feb, so I wont know if this is enough. It'll be like when I ride the bike with my eyes closed, sometimes I open to find the "Reduce speed to reduce heart rate" message and other times I see the HR closer to 150... It's a gamble.

"We confess our little faults to persuade people that we have no large ones." ~ Francois de La Rochefoucauld